Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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