I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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