My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize