she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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