does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
This show inspires me to have sex in space
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Randomize
