you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
