I bet he comes in French.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize