Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
