just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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