Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
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