Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
