Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
