I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
