The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I deserve this hangover.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize