it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
