im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
