The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
