There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
