is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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