I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
It was confusing and full of hummus
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
