: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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