Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize