so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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