i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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