my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
