girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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