I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
