Duck Duck Cougar?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
It all started with a game of naked twister.
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