I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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