there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Randomize
