do herpes really smell.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize