This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she looked like the before picture.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
