Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
