have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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