got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I understand Curling. That high.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
