hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
