one two three fourrrrnication!
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize