his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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