it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
