U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Randomize
