and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize