White coat. Heels.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Randomize