Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
