you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
