also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
