what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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