the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
