i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Randomize
