He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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