Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
