her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
